Today is our 15th anniversary! And while it is commonly known that the traditional gift for 25 years is silver, and the gift for 50 years is gold,  it is a lesser known fact that the gift for 15 years is a blog post. So since I am a slave to convention,  here ya go babe! This one’s for you!

Fifteen Things to Look for in a Man

1. A man that knows and loves Jesus and the Word of God

2. A man that will join you in your hobbies

3. A man that loves Chik fil a….. enough to wear cow ears

4. A man that puts your happiness above his pride

5. A man that understands your love for Movember and is not threatened by your pre-teen crush on Magnum P.I.

6. A man that will drive 23 hours straight to take you to the place of your birth

7. And drive you the very next summer across the country to California to see your college roomie

8. A man who cares for and respects the elderly

9. A man who loves your family

10. A man that loves and respects his mom

11. A man that will fly you back to NY, just to meet your fav talk show host

12. A man that dances. Your daughters will thank you

13. A man that regularly shows affection

14. A man who can wrestle. Wrestling is really important

15. And last, but definitely not least, a man with whom those sparks fly!

Here’s the truth. Having a list is important. But a list won’t get you to fifteen years or even fifteen months. It takes more than ideals and standards to build a thriving marriage. You need love. But not just any love. You need the greatest love. Jesus told His disciples that there is no greater love than to lay down your life for another. Listening to Kelly Minter recently brought new depth to that verse for me. Yes, Jesus laid down his life at the cross, she reminded us. But that wasn’t the first time He laid down His life. Every day that he stepped foot on this earth was a day that He laid down his life in heaven for us. Having a beautiful marriage requires this kind of love. Laying your life down every dang day for the person on the pillow next to you. That is the greatest love. That means laying down your right to be right. Laying down your pride. Laying down what’s fair. Laying down past pains. Laying down insecurities. Laying it all down and loving with an everlasting love that can only come from God. Without a doubt, Paul is truly more than I could have hoped for or imagined, but we have been through many ups and downs. We are broken people with hurts we are healing together.  We have had horrible fights (aka “strong fellowship”) that left me doing the ugly cry,  and we have had utopian moments when I thought my heart would burst. Yet without exception, our marriage is the strongest, happiest, and the sweetest when we are mutually seeking to serve the other through the power of our loving Creator.