Wow! What a morning. And all this drama on “Clean Sheet Wednesday”? How would I get it all done? Rest assured, the sheets (and you all know there are a lot of them) are cleaned and back on the beds. Phew. But really, how was I ever going to reply to Peter So and So on facebook?? He was getting impatient! He waited 30 whole seconds on before giving me the ol’ “A-HA! I knew you couldn’t answer!” Simmer down now Peter! I have beds to change!
After teaching, and cleaning, and lunching, and witnessing unprecedented activity on my blog good and bad, I had to go for a run. Clear my head. Pray for direction. This is what I wanted right? A platform to tell others about Jesus? But man, people are angry and mean. Look, I am a big girl, and have a knack for disregarding crazy and bitter. Nevertheless, angry people can wear on anyone. I don’t know if this is the road I want to go down. In fact from my very first post, (click here to read)
you can see my struggle with God.
It started when I was a teenager and would enjoy explaining math problems to any that were confused around me. It went like this. They couldn’t understand it. I explained it. They were happy. It was then that I decided to become a math teacher, although I didn’t particularly like math. It was a bit much work for my taste. And that was in just in high school! Ha! I had no idea what I was in for pursuing a pure math degree along with teacher certification. Over and over I prayed for permission from God to drop out of my math major. Biblical counseling sounds like fun! This is too hard! But God refused. “I am not calling you into ministry because you don’t want to work hard,” he whispered into my soul. Fine. I trudged through. And I finished.
Then I taught in a public school where over and over I heard from students that I taught who used to hate math, but now loved it! Yes! This is what any good teacher strives for and lots can achieve. However it was not all sunshine and roses. It was also at this school where I learned another important lesson I can use today. Consider the source. After a particularly difficult lesson, a student known for being a regular consumer of marijuana, raised his hand and proclaimed, “I understood this last year when Mr. Hanley taught it, but I don’t understand the way you are teaching it.” Wow. The ultimate blow. The opposite of what every good teacher strives for. But this was Tony. So I was unfazed. “Tony,” I began, “do you think that maybe this was easier last year because you had more brain cells then?” And his response confirmed my theory. He looked around, laughed, and admitted “You might be right.” So there’s that. Consider the source.
And then there was last night. I was too tired to watch the debate, until I had to, but I definitely wasn’t going to write about it. I couldn’t. My brain was mush. It was three o’clock in the morning after my hardest day of the week. Fine. I would start writing, but there was no way I would finish. But I did. So for those that were so wholeheartedly offended by my less than perfect grammar, I had been up 24 hours. Give a girl a break. Although, truth be told, even on a good night of sleep, I would never ever claim to be a perfect writer. Ever. So if that is your thing, we should amicably part ways. I don’t see our relationship going anywhere.
So back to my run. I called a friend and downloaded, and she advised, and I hung up to pray some more. But for a faith having, God loving Christian, I have to admit I really wasn’t expecting an answer. I didn’t see anything God could show me that would give me peace one way or the other. Until he did. He reminded me of what we have been studying in Psalms that I did not relate to at all when I read it. In fact, in the blog, I either didn’t even mention said verses, or didn’t comment on them because I just couldn’t relate. Until today. But because I was storing them in my heart. They were there, today, when I needed them. You see, over the last 6 hours or so, because of a blog post I wrote here,
I have been “yelled” at, mocked, called names, “laughed” at. And on and on.
Here are the previous studies:
Psalm 27: Wait!
Here are the verse I didn’t relate to before today:
Psalm 7: O Lord my God, in You I put my trust;Save me from all those who persecute me;
And deliver me,
2 Lest they tear me like a lion,Rending mein pieces
, while there is
none to deliver.
3 O Lord my God, if I have done this:
If there is iniquity in my hands,
4 If I have repaid evil to him who was at peace with me,
Or have plundered my enemy without cause,
5 Let the enemy pursue me and overtake me;
Yes, let him trample my life to the earth,
And lay my honor in the dust. Selah
9 Oh, let the wickedness of the wicked come to an end,
But establish the just;
For the righteous God tests the hearts and minds.
10 My defense is of God,Who saves the upright in heart.
14 Behold, the wicked brings forth iniquity;
Yes, he conceives trouble and brings forth falsehood.
15 He made a pit and dug it out,
And has fallen into the ditch which he made.
trouble shall return upon his own head,
And his violent dealing shall come down on his own crown.
3 Though an army may encamp against me,
My heart shall not fear;
Though war may rise against me,
In this I will beconfident.
4 One thing I have desired of the Lord,
That will I seek:
That I may dwell in the house of the Lord
All the days of my life,
To behold the beauty of the Lord,
And to inquire in His temple.
5 For in the time of trouble
He shall hide me in His pavilion;
In the secret place of His tabernacle
He shall hide me;
He shall set me high upon a rock.
6 And now my head shall be lifted up above my enemies all around me;
Therefore I will offer sacrifices of joy in His tabernacle;
I will sing, yes, I will sing praises to the Lord.
Teach me Your way, O Lord,
And lead me in a smooth path, because of my enemies.
12 Do not deliver me to the will of my adversaries;For false witnesses have risen against me,
And such as breathe out violence.
Today I am thankful for a God who sees the future. And longs to prepare us for it! And that, Dear Impatient Peter from facebook, is something of which I could never be convinced otherwise. And above all, I pray that you would find that too.